I am supplement bottle feeding 12 pups right now and I must say I think it is the greatest job ever. There is nothing like feeling indispensable to someone or something. The little fellows bring a smile to my face every time they wobble over leaving their real mom (who doesn't have enough milk for everyone) to come to me. Its a major ego booster
I have been thinking about it for the last week as I feed them, this feeling I get from caring for them. Its not new to me since I have bottle fed things from childhood, everything from abandoned birds to buffalo calves, but each time I am amazed by the emotions it engenders. Some people may say at this point "ah you have a mothering instinct" but thats not so I have seen this in men also. I think it is just a hardwired into "normal" humans to care, to nurture.
Lately I have taken this a step further and the more I think about it the more I believe this is part of the problem with marriage these days and why so many are falling apart (and many will not even say "I do" in the first place).
It is human to care for others and I think we need someone to depend on us in order to make us mature into responsible fulfilled adults ( I do not think it always has to be a spouse that fills this position by the way, it could be a parent, child or even a good friend) . In the old days a man was expected to take financial and protective care of his family. He saw the woman as mostly helpless because she could not physically work as hard as he, nor were there very many occupations or education open to them (though a few determined women throughout the ages have proven women can more than take care of themselves if they want to) Much like the puppies he would see the woman as something he alone was capable of nurturing. In turn the woman had children which only she could care for, (also women have always seen men as helpless ) bringing purpose and balance to the home and human emotions. We are now working on the second generation of people born after women gained the rights to the same education and jobs as men. So children have been raised in a home where their mother probably works and may earn as much or more than dad. Statistically world-wide women work harder and longer than men (and still get payed less in most places) . No more are women seen as something to be cherished and cared for, instead husbands expect their wives to continue mothering them, bring home a paycheck and do all the dishes. Most women (stupidly, in my opinion) comply, sending children off to daycare and heading to the office. The man does not feel that his family depends solely on him “his wife will do it” so he loses that feeling of importance and responsibility you get when people are counting on you. The woman feels she is being overloaded and “her husband just doesn't care” (if I had a dollar for every time I have heard that!) not realizing she helped create this mess. The children do not get the attention and concern they need for an example for them to copy later and so the vicious circle continues into the next generation.
And if any of you are wondering of my qualifications for writing this since I am not married and have no children you just try being a riding instructor for a few years! You hear it all. Something about the rhythmic movement of a horse, I think, brings peace and people just start poring their hearts out. So far the saddest I have heard was a ten year old that admitted to me he had tried to commit suicide. Yes I think the social system of our world is breaking down.
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